>How about the fathers among us giving Ricky a taste of what lies in store?
>What freaks you out about having kids?
>Tony - you've got the oldest kids (girls too!)

Well, the day to day irritations he really should discover for himself. But, I will mention two things that I think every parent faces, but no one ever talks about

The first problem is that when it comes to confrontation, kids always win. They can simply last longer than you can, and don't care about most punishments you are likely to devise (unless you turn into a sadistic bastard). Eventually, through years of training and restraint and good parenting, you may teach them that doing the things you want really will pay off for them. It's hard work, but rewarding.

The real problem is that, because our society is out of whack, you have to teach them that adults and/or laws are stupid, thus either undermining your own point or having to turn every incident into a philosophy discussion.

In elementary school:
"Why can't I bring this Magic deck into school to show my friends?".
"You can't because the school sent a note home saying that no students are allowed to bring card games of any sort into school or they get taken away".
"Why?"
"Because some kids were playing cards for money."
"But we're not playing for money, I just wanted to show my new deck to my friend. That's stupid!"
"Umm, yes, it is stupid. But they make rules like this so the teachers don't have to think. They can just enforce them and the school will back them up."
"But Billy brought in his cards the other day and the lunch lady didn't take them away. That's not fair".
"Yes, that's not fair. If she doesn't take his away, but takes someone else's away, then she is ignoring the rule because she realized it wasn't a problem this time."
"So rules you think are stupid you shouldn't follow?"
"Um, sometimes, but you should ask me which ones first...?"
"Why?"
"Hey look, Mommy bought doughnuts. You want one?"

Teaching them to drive: (oh, yeah, that *is* a scary one. So Rick, you'll be 60 when you try that? Have a visit to your cardiologist first. heh,heh,heh :-) )

Me: "You're going too slow. You're only going 55 in the left lane. Cars are piling up behind you."
"But 55 is the speed limit".
"Yeah, but if you're in the left lane you should be moving faster than the people in the right lane, and they don't enforce limits unless they want to. They set up traps for the easy targets."
"That's not fair"
... insert the card conversation here, with the words
... suitably search-and-replaced
"Hey look, pull in there, at the Dunkin' Donuts."

Virtually every law or rule they encounter today is an example of things being based on arbitrary rules rather than basic fairness. And they learn that exploiting the rules is the best path to success. It's like living in a game of 100-Power Cosmic Encounter with extra flares.

What it is is mentally exhausting. You have to do an ethics class every freaking day so that they understand that they really have to judge things on their merits rather than just OBEY. But, when you do that, you also teach them that they don't have to obey YOU, unless they think what you tell them makes sense. You're allowed no imperfections.

In a nutshell, you can't do squat to insure that you will parent well. You just have to be happy with the knowledge that you tried and hope you don't screw them up too badly.